Quiet Time
by Robyn Hood
Summary: Kurt is having some questions about his faith. A conversation with OC character Adella. No pairing.


_*This story is quite a different one for me. First, I'd just like to say that this is kind of a conglomeration of the comics, movies, and of course, X-Men: Evolutions. And some of my own ideas. I hope you like Adella. She's my OC character. Thanks to my sister for the use of her character Reighan. One last thing. I hope you take something away from this story. I wondered a lot of these things and writing it in story form is just good for me. I know it's kind of heavy and sorry about that, but it has light moments. I promise I'm not trying to be preachy. I always had trouble integrating my faith into stories such as this one and Kurt's character really opened up a way for me to do that. Thanks to Kurt's creator Dave Cockrum for the wonderful character of Nightcrawler._

_*Disclaimer: I don't own X-Men or X-Men: Evolutions_

Adella was walking through the empty dining room of the Xavier Institute for Gifted Youngsters. She was on her way to the kitchen to grab a glass of water and maybe some carrots or celery to snack on when she noticed someone slumped over the table. It was somewhat dark in the room, but she could make out the figure, even though her abilities let her know who it was. They always switched on when she noticed someone around her. Most people got mad when they found out what she could do. They didn't want some stranger knowing everything they had ever said or done. Adella couldn't blame them. She wouldn't want such an invasion of privacy either, but she couldn't stop it. She had come to rely on it. However, here at the Institute, she was learning more about her power and how to control it.

She stopped and turned to face the lonely figure. "Kurt?"

He looked up at the short, curvy redhead; his chrome yellow eyes glowing like a cat's. "Oh, hey Adella. Didn't see you come in here."

Adella didn't need her powers to know something had Kurt down. He was always so happy-go-lucky. He even flirted with her, which she found cute, much to her boyfriend's chagrin.

She strode over to where he was sitting and took a seat next to him. "_Ist alles in Ordnung_?" (Is everything okay?)

Kurt smiled. Adella had an Austrian aunt who had taught her German. It was nice to have someone to speak to in his native language. "_Ja und nein_." (Yes and no).

"Then what's wrong?" Adella asked, switching back to English.

Kurt sighed and looked at the open Bible in front of him. His rosary beads were lying across the worn pages. Adella followed his gaze.

"Oh." Was all she said.

Kurt was glad that Adella had been the one to come in here. She was the only other person in this Institute that he knew of who was a Christian. Kitty was a practicing Jew, but he didn't know of any other religious people there.

"So, what's got you down?" Adella asked. She was a Southern Baptist, not Catholic, as Kurt was, and their doctrines differed, but that didn't matter. A Christian was a Christian, no matter the denomination, and she and Kurt were brother and sister in the family of God.

Kurt sighed again. "It's just so much work to be a Christian. Don't get me wrong, I love God, and want to follow Him, but it's so hard."

"Yeah, it is. But you need to remember Philippians 4:13. 'I can do all things through Christ who strengthens me.' He knew that we would have a hard time following Him, so He promised to help us through it. And He _never_ breaks his promises." She smiled, remembering Abraham, who was promised to be made into a great nation, even though he and his wife were well past childbearing years and had no children. He became the father of Israelite nation.

"_Ja_, but there's so much ve have to do. Pray, go to confession, beg for absolution, read zhe Bible…"

"No. _We_ don't have to do anything but tell Him we know we've done wrong and ask for forgiveness. He did everything else. He died on the cross and rose from the dead. That was our absolution. All we have to do is ask for it and He'll give it to us. You know, in Matthew 7:7 it says, 'Keep asking, and it will be given to you. Keep searching, and you will find. Keep knocking, and the door will be opened to you. For everyone who asks receives, and the one who searches finds, and to the one who knocks, the door will be opened.'" Adella opened her mouth to continue, but Kurt cut in.

"Okay, but still, ve have to go and have a priest intercede."

"No we don't. You've read the Bible, haven't you, Kurt?"

"_Ja_."

"Okay, so remember when Jesus died on the cross?"

"Of course. Zhat's like zhe whole basis of Christianity." Kurt stated.

"And the Resurrection. Without Christ's resurrection, His crucifixion would mean nothing. But anyway, after Jesus said, 'it is finished' and died, the sky turned dark, there was an earthquake, and what else happened?"

Kurt thought for a moment. Lots of things had happened. What did she want him to say? "Zhe people vere afraid and one of zhe Roman soldiers realized who Jesus vas."

"Yeah, that did happen, but I was thinking of when the curtain separating the Holy of Holies was ripped in two, from the top to the bottom." Adella waited for his response, hoping he would catch on to what she was wanting to say.

"Zhe Holy of Holies vas in zhe temple, no?" Kurt asked.

"Yeah. Only the high priest could enter there, and only once a year. That's where God 'lived', so to speak. The high priest had to intercede on everyone else's behalf. But when Jesus died, the curtain separating it from the rest of the temple, where anyone could be, was torn, top to bottom. What do you think that means?"

Kurt knew she was emphasizing the whole top-to-bottom thing. And then he knew why. "God tore zhe curtain. _Ja_, I remember. It said so in zhe Bible."

"So why did God Himself tear the curtain?"

"So ozzer people could get in!" Kurt realized what she was saying.

"Yes! Normal people could go directly to God, without having to go to an intercessor. Now, we both know, we can pray for other people, what we call interceding now, but a person has to ask for his _own _forgiveness. No one else can do it for him."

"_Und_ only _Gott_ can forgive sins." Kurt added.

"Right. So, there's one thing you don't have to do. You can confess straight to God." Adella smiled.

"Okay, so vhat about praying and reading zhe Bible and penance and such?"

"Well, Kurt, we both know praying and reading the Bible is not necessary to be saved or even maintain one's salvation. Those are things we do because we want to get to know God and spend time with Him. Those are things we _choose _to do, because we love him. And penance? I don't believe in that. I know Catholics do, but the Bible never says anything about having to work for salvation. Actually, it says just the opposite. Romans 3:23 says, 'For all have sinned and fallen short of the glory of God.' Romans 3:10 says 'There is no one righteous. Not even one.' And as Romans 6:23 says, 'The payment for sin is death, but the gift of God is eternal life.' _That's_ what salvation is. A gift. We can't earn it, because we're not good enough. All we have to do is accept the gift."

"You sure know a lot of Scripture to back zhis up." Kurt mused.

Adella smiled. "I had the privilege of growing up in a Christian home and in church. Plus, I've done a lot of searching myself. I got to the point where I wanted to know what I believed and why, and if I even wanted to believe at all. But, don't simply take me at my word. Look up the verses yourself. Pray and think about them. If for some reason I have been deceived, don't let me deceive you. The Bible warns about false teachers, so always check your Bible to make sure what people tell you is backed up with Scripture."

Kurt nodded and thought about what she had said. He knew she struggled with depression and anxiety, as well as OCD. He wondered if those things ever had anything to do with why she searched for these answers in the first place. "So… No penance to attain salvation?"

"I don't believe there is. That's how I understand the verses anyway. Isaiah in the Bible cried out and said, 'I am a man of unclean lips and I live among a people of unclean lips.' That's Isaiah 6:5, I think. He knew he wasn't good enough, but God used Him anyway. It's one of my favorite passages, because later God says, "Whom shall I send? Who will go before us?' and Isaiah says, 'Here I am. Send me.' I wanted that to be my life verse. That God will send me and purify me as he did Isaiah." Adella smiled and sighed, feeling engulfed in the love of the One she spoke of.

"_Ja_. I vant that too. But didn't zhe angel put a burning coal to Isaiah's lips to purify zhem? Zhat sounds like it vould hurt." Kurt said.

"Read Job. He went through pretty much everything the devil could throw at him, but he was better off for it. He grew closer to God and was blessed more than he ever had been in the end. There was a happy ending. You know that with Christ, there's always a happy ending. And the Bible talks about how we often go through cleansing fires, like the ones used to purify gold. After the gold goes through the fires, the impurities are removed, and it is stronger and more beautiful then ever. And it's worth is immensely more."

"I have read Job. I kind of felt like him sometimes. Everyone seems to hate me and everything zhat can go wrong usually does. Up until now." Kurt looked down at his worn rosary beads.

"Jehovah-Jireh." Adella smiled.

"Vhat?"

"Jehovah-Jireh. It's my favorite name for God. It means, 'the LORD will provide.' And, obviously, He has been providing for you. You may have been mistreated and many bad things have happened, but you're here, you're safe, and you're happy. And He will continue to provide. Just trust Him."

"I like zhat name. I like to zhink of Him as my Heavenly Fazher. I guess not having a real fazher has to do somezhing vith it." Kurt smiled back.

"I have a real dad and I still like to think of Him as my Heavenly Father." Adella laughed.

One side of Kurt's mouth turned up in a smile. Adella knew how to make people happy, even if she wasn't always happy herself. She still tried for others. He turned more serious. "Okay, but sometimes I vonder vhy Gott vould go zhrough all of zhe trouble to die on zhe cross and resurrect only to have us constantly…I don't know…_losing_ our salvation vhen ve sin again. It just seems troublesome."

"Yeah. It would be. But I don't believe you can lose your salvation once you've got it. Here," She took his Bible and flipped through it.

_Good zhing she can read German._ Kurt thought.

"Here it is!" Adella read, translating the German to English, "'For I am persuaded that neither death nor life, nor angels nor rulers, nor things present, nor things to come, nor powers, nor height, nor depth, nor any other created thing will have the power to separate us from the love of God that is in Christ Jesus our LORD!' Some other translations say, 'nor angels nor demons' and 'no power of Hell'. I really like those. Oh, and I remember another one!" Adella flipped through the Bible, skimming to find the correct verse.

_Nor demons_. Kurt thought. He liked that too.

"Here we go. John 10: 28-29. 'I will give them eternal life, and they will never perish ¾ ever! No one will snatch them out of My hand. My Father, who has given them to Me, is greater than all. No one is able to snatch them out of the Father's hand.' So, there. You're safe." Adella smirked, shutting the Bible.

"Okay, but vone more qvestion. Maybe two."

"Ask away. I can't promise that I have all the answers, though."

"Vone. Do you zhink zhat I am unable to be saved?"

"Why would you think that?" She tilted her head, her glossy red curls spilling over her shoulder.

"Maybe because of zhe vay I look. I _look_ like a demon." Kurt gestured to himself.

Adella reached over and tucked a stray lock of hair behind his pointed, blue ear. "What a pity, that you can't see how unique you really are for all the lies that have been fed to you your entire life. Kurt, I honestly think that you're adorable. You're one of the cutest guys I've ever seen."

"But you vouldn't date a guy who looked like me. You must zhink I'm cute like a puppy or somezhing." Kurt's eyes dropped.

"After meeting you, I've wondered if I would date a guy who looked like you. I don't really know the answer. I _have _dated a guy that I wasn't attracted to. He was just my best friend. I don't regret it. Now, I do have a boyfriend, and I swore to myself never to date a guy younger than me. Sorry, sweetheart, but I'm seventeen and you're only fifteen. Though, I do think you are becoming a handsome young man. But since you're my friend and younger than me, I think you're little-kid cute. Not a puppy cute." Adella's face was serious.

"You're just saying zhat because you don't vant to hurt my feelings."

Adella couldn't help a tinge of frustration from darkening her face. She wished Kurt could see him as she saw him. He was one of the coolest guys she knew. Growing up looking like he did had to be hard. Heck, it was hard for normal-looking people. Her own older brother had struggled with anorexia and bulimia (not common for guys, but it exists). She had been called pretty and even beautiful before, but she still looked in the mirror and found it hard to like what she saw. But despite that, she wished he could accept himself and love himself. He was her friend and she cared for him deeply. She didn't want for him to hurt. "Well, you know I wish _I_ was born with pointed ears. And you make me jealous every time I see your tail." She smirked.

"It is a nice tail." He mused.

"Yeah. You can hang upside-down, pick up things, hold things. It's like having an extra arm. I kind of wish I had a tail."

"Yours would be like a cat's tail. Since you have your pet cats." Kurt thought aloud.

"But I want a prehensile one like yours!" Adella complained.

"Too bad. Only _I _can have a prehensile tail." Kurt joked.

"Oh, and you know blue is my favorite color. It looks good on you, by the way." She grinned.

"_Danke_. Can you imagine me any ozher color?" Kurt asked, grinning back, baring his fangs.

"No. Oh, and your fangs! I would love those too! They look so cool! You know, I had a friend who wore fake fangs. They looked real, though." Adella added.

"Okay, so maybe I do have some pretty awesome features, but vhat about zhe glowing yellow eyes, or zhe fur, or my hands and feet?" Kurt asked

"Love your eyes. Although, I wish mine looked like cat eyes, you know?"

"I can see zhat." Kurt conceded. Adella loved cats. And as she had a second power that allowed her to talk to and control animals, she was constantly surrounded by the much bigger and more ferocious cousins of housecats.

"They glow, though. Which is awesome. They do kind of remind me of a cat's eyes, I guess. The yellow and glowingness. And let's see, my mom would probably love to have fur. She's always cold. You're hands and feet. Honestly, I love my five fingers and five toes, but I have to say yours are interesting to say the least. I do love your feet, though. Again, they remind me of a cat."

"So, basically, you wish you were a cat?" Kurt joked.

"Nah. I like being human." Adella shrugged.

"Vell, enough about vhat _you _zink. Vhat does _Gott_ zink?" He asked.

"Does God make mistakes, Kurt?"

"No."

"Are you His creation?"

"Yes."

"Then obviously, He loves you, despite what you look like. Kurt, you know He loves anyone, despite what they've done. How can appearance hinder Him from loving you?"

"I don't know. I guess just so many people zink I'm inherently evil or somezhing because of how I look. Even my mozher didn't love me and she doesn't look normal eizher!" Kurt bowed his head.

"Mystique is a jerk. And I doubt she got rid of you because of your appearance. Even if she did, it's just proof that she's crazy. And people will think what they think. We obviously don't think like God. There are people who claim to be Christians, but wouldn't let us in their church if they knew we were mutants. But God doesn't discriminate. He created us. We're people, too. If they truly wanted to be like Him, like they claim they do, they would love those who are different instead of hate them. That's what Jesus instructed us to do. He even told us to love our enemies.

"Now, I've met some of these so-called 'Christians' who would treat us differently, but I've also met real Christians, who welcomed me as family. For we are all in the family of God. Those people love me and my family. My parents are mutants. My older brother is a mutant. My younger brother will probably prove to be one too once he hits puberty, and these people at this church know. They love us and accept us just as we are, just like Jesus instructed them to do. Just like He instructs us to do. I wish you could come home with me to Alabama sometime and go to church with me. It's a lot different than Catholic Mass, but you could go without your image inducer, and I guarantee you that you would be hugged and loved and everyone would smile at you and welcome you. They would shake your hand and ask you to stick around. They'd make you a part of the family, then they would invite you over to their homes and cook you the best daggum meal you ever did eat. That's how real Christians act. Hating no one and loving everyone." Adella's Southern accent got stronger the more passionate she got, but Kurt had to love it. It was softer than Rogue's, and quite different as well.

"I vould like zhat. But I doubt I could go." Kurt said, wishing he could go. He liked the way that sounded. And who was he to turn down the promise of a free home-cooked meal?

"Who knows? If you're not going anywhere for Thanksgiving, maybe you could come home with me." She smiled.

"Vouldn't your family mind?"

"Nope. They love having my friends over. And my brothers' friends too. You'd be welcome."

"I'll zhink about it." Kurt told her.

"So now that we've got that out of the way, what was your other question?" Adella asked.

"Vell, it vas kind of part two to zhe same vone." Kurt admitted.

"And that is?"

"Vould _Gott_ vant to save me? I am past redemption?" Kurt whispered the last bit.

"Why would you be?" Adella asked, tilting her head again. Her thin eyebrows drew in and her plump, red lips puckered ever so slightly.

"Because I'm too bad." Kurt turned his head away in shame.

"Well, what have you done that's so bad, Kurt? You don't have to answer, but could it be worse than King David, whom God called a man after His own heart? He committed adultery and murdered the woman's husband. God redeemed him. Or how about the Great Apostle Paul? He killed Christians. Or Peter, one of Jesus' closest disciples? He denied knowing Jesus three times during the crucifixion. Or need I remind you of¾"

"Okay, I get it! Zhere vere bad people in zhe Bible who _Gott_ used and redeemed."

"I most, if not all, of the major characters in the Bible were what we would classify as 'horrible sinners'. They even slipped up during their walk with God, but He still loved them. They made mistakes again and again, but we remember them as great, holy people." Adella flipped her hair over her shoulder. "I think the problem is _you _can't forgive yourself. God already has. You asked him, didn't you?"

"_Ja_. Many times."

"Then believe He has. There's a verse in Romans, 10:13, I think that says, 'For everyone who calls upon the name of the LORD shall be saved.' Then, a couple verses before that one, it says, 'if you confess with your mouth, "Jesus is Lord," and believe in your heart that God raised Him from the dead, you will be saved.' And of course, John 3:16 says 'so that whosoever believes in Him shall be saved and have eternal life'. Did you hear any 'maybes' or 'probably will be saved' or 'if they're good enough' in there?"

"No."

"That's right. Anyone can be saved if they ask. No matter how bad they are."

"Vell, zhat is good to know. But how do I forgive myself?" Kurt asked, looking up at her through the hair hanging in his face.

"Ask God. He'll give you strength." Adella said simply.

"But I _killed_ someone, Adella. I can't be free of zhat." He dropped his head again.

This time, Adella was the one to lower her head, ashamed that she already knew his darkest secrets. "Yeah, I know." She said softly. "But that was an accident, Kurt. You didn't mean to hurt Stefan."

"But zhe fact of zhe matter is, I did." Kurt clenched and unclenched his fists, staring at the three fat, furry fingers on them.

"Would you consider Reighan a murderer, then?" Adella was referring to one of the other new students at the Institute. A striking, seventeen-year old girl with jet black hair and a sharp wit.

"Of course not! She didn't mean to kill her sister!" Kurt defended her immediately. He had become good friends with Reighan, as had Adella. Most of the other kids were scared of her because of her power. She was a manipulator, and didn't know how to control her powers. Any time she used an imperative sentence, the person she was talking to had no choice but to do as she said. Unfortunately for Reighan, she loved using sarcasm. Quite often, she would tell someone to go jump off a bridge, then catch herself and quickly tell them not to. Sadly, when her power had manifested, she hadn't even known. Her trademark sarcasm came out in a fight with her twin sister, in which Reighan's parting words were "Just go kill yourself!" Her sister did just that, and Reighan blamed herself.

"So, if Reighan's not a killer, then you must not be. Try to see yourself in the same light. You know how you're always telling people to see through different eyes? Try practicing what you preach, sweetheart."

Kurt's eyes dropped. She had him there. And now he felt like a hypocrite. After a few moments of silence, he took a deep breath.

"So, last qvestion number two. I know _Gott _loves us, but I have often vondered, vhy does he allow bad things to happen?"

"A lot of people wonder that same thing. I did too, but I found my answer. When God created us, He did so because He wanted companions. But He loved us so much, that He didn't want to force us to love Him. Think of it like this: do you want someone to _have_ to love you, or do you want them to _choose _to love you?" Adella asked.

"Choose. It vouldn't be real love, ozhervise."

"Exactly. So, Adam and Eve chose against Him. They didn't want Him, so He let them travel away from Him. He won't force us to stay close to Him, even though He knows it's best for us. We don't always listen. We're like children. We don't know what's best, but He does, yet we don't listen to Him. Anyway, God is good, right? And He's where all good things come from, so separation from Him means that not-so-good things happen. The reality is that we choose it. It's not His fault. But He does have a right to get angry with us, especially after all He's done for us. He created us, created this world for us, and suffered and died for us. What hasn't He done for us? I would be mad too, but it's a good thing that all we have to do is ask forgiveness and He forgets His anger and instead wants to bless us as much as we will let Him."

"Vell, zhat _does _make sense. Zhanks, Adella. You've really helped me out." Kurt smiled.

"You're welcome, Kurt. I'm glad I could help you understand things better." She leaned over and gave him a hug. She couldn't help but enjoy hugging Kurt. He was so soft, and he always smelled like the soap he used, which smelled pretty good. And to add to the intimacy and safeness of his embrace, his tail wrapped around her. She was _so _jealous of his tail!

Just as Kurt's tail wrapped itself around Adella's waist, Logan walked in, clutching a beer. "Ahem," he cleared his throat loudly.

Kurt and Adella pulled apart, neither one embarrassed. They were just friends hugging. It was innocent.

"Hey, Logan." Kurt said brightly. His mood had improved since he now had a better understanding of things.

"Hey. What're you kids up to?" Logan asked, just to be polite. He wasn't really interested.

"Talking about Christianity." Kurt smiled.

Logan nearly groaned. "All right, well, I'm outta here. You two have fun."

Adella simply shook her head and sighed. "Come on Kurt. Let's go get something to eat. I'm hungry."

Kurt jumped up and grinned. "I'm starving!"

Adella laughed at his excitement. "You're _always_ hungry!"

"Vhat can I say? I'm a growing boy." He smiled and puffed out his chest.

"Just try to grow vertically and not horizontally." Adella joked.

"I'll _try_."

And with that, the two went to go get food.

_*Hope you liked it. I am planning on posting more stories with Adella in them, and Reighan as well._


End file.
